When It's Time To Be Selfish

We are taught our entire lives that being selfish is a bad thing: putting other people before yourself is the way to go, and never make everything about you and your needs or desires. And in a lot of circumstances, I still find that to be true.

However, I also know that sometimes, being selfish is exactly what you need to do.

I’ve always been a selfless person for the most part. At least I like to think so. I thoroughly enjoy other people's happiness, and will often do whatever I can to make that happen. I love giving gifts, I love making others feel loved, and putting their needs before my own. We’re trained to be this way. Nobody wants to be labeled as selfish or self-centered.

So why in the world would there ever be a time to be selfish?

You need to take care of yourself. Physically, and mentally. You can work out everyday, eat clean and still not be completely healthy. Mental health is a serious, scientifically proven problem that affects more than just your mood. I can say from experience that no matter how healthy you think you are, mental issues can put a physical toll on you as well.

I’m surrounded by other people who suffer from mental illness of some sort. Depression, anxiety, bipolar, eating disorders, and so many more. I’ve personally been dealing with depression and anxiety for most of my life, but its always been something I kept to myself as much as I could. Not wanting to worry anyone else, or realizing someone else needed help with their problems more than I did, and putting mine on the back burner to help them is what seemed like the right thing to do.

I’ve never not loved helping other people get through their issues. I want to do anything I can to make someone feel worthy and good about themselves. That’s not what this is about.

By constantly putting my feelings and issues on the back burner, I have essentially begun to neglect them. It’s when you start to ignore what’s bothering you that they actually begin to grow and get significantly worse.

If you feel yourself beginning to feel like you’re being dragged down by your own actions or lack there of, if the weight of your feelings is getting too heavy, if you find yourself breaking down and losing it more often and with less warning, then it might be time to be selfish.

If the slightest bump in the road brings you all the way down, if you feel overwhelmed with the slightest of issues, if you seem to be snapping at people or wanting to give up completely, it’s time to be selfish.

If one day you find that you have officially reached your breaking point, it’s time to be selfish.

Take your life back. If you’re not happy where you are, leave. If you’re not satisfied with the people you choose to keep around, let them go. For one second forget about everyone else, and remember that YOU deserve the respect you constantly give to others. Do what you need to do for no reason other than it’s what is right for you. Don’t look to others for what you should do.

I’ve found that intuition is an incredibly powerful thing. That inner voice in your head? It’s there for a reason. Listen to it.

I for one can vouch for all of you thinking that you just can’t do that. You can’t leave, you can’t walk away, and make a change for bettering yourself. It wasn’t until I hit that breaking point that I realized that being selfish was the only way I was going to be better. But don’t wait for that breaking point. Don’t let yourself get there.

I came across a quote recently. “Sometimes the wrong choices bring us to the right places.” We all mess up, but sometimes it is that that makes us realize where we are really supposed to be.

So go ahead. Be selfish. Do things for you. You get one chance in life, so make it great.